Week 1 - Courage
This Mars retrograde starts in Leo – the sign of the heart – so it’s perfect timing to explore an important quality of Mars – courage. The word courage comes from the Latin word for heart – cor. It originally meant “to speak one’s mind by telling all one’s heart” which is a courageous act indeed (source – Brene Brown)
What is courage?
Let’s delve deeper into the essence of courage. Courage is the mental or moral strength to face threat, risk or challenge and keep going. It is not the absence of fear but rather the decision that something else is more important than fear. As we face a more uncertain future, courage supports us to step into the unknown, embracing vulnerability, and allowing ourselves to be seen as we truly are.
Think of a moment when you acted despite your fears and reflect on what drove you past the discomfort. In your journal, write down what ignited your courage in those moments. Perhaps it was your responsibility? Or your passion? Or fighting for something meaningful? Whatever it was, I’ll bet it was linked to your values.
When we live according to our values, we create our own deeply personal measurement of success and create a set of guidelines to live within. Our values shape our convictions and help us know our personal rights and wrongs.
So grab a journal and follow the below exercise, drawn from Steven Hayes work on values in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT).
Values Exercise
This two-part exercise may require some time, so it’s a good idea to set aside an hour or split it into two 30-minute sessions. It’s the most extensive task in this course, but well worth the effort, as it will offer valuable insights and help you discover where to tap into your courage when needed. As you work through this exercise, I recommend listening to bineural music, such as this one, to stimulate and engage both sides of your brain.
Identify Key Areas of Your Life
In your journal, list the following life areas:
- Intimate Relationships
- Family
- Friends
- Community
- Environment
- Work
- Education
- Recreation
- Spirituality
- Physical Well-Being
Next, rate each area on a scale from 1 to 10 based on how important it is to you, where 1 represents “not important” and 10 represents “extremely important.” Remember, this is based on your personal experience right now, and there are no right or wrong answers.
Once you’ve rated the importance of each area, go ahead and rate them again, this time based on how consistent your actions are with your values in that area. For example, if you haven’t been spending much time with your partner, you might give “Intimate Relationships” a rating of 2. If you’ve been dedicating time to studying, you might rate “Education” as an 8.
After completing this, examine your answers and focus on areas that you rated highly in importance (8 to 10) but scored lower in consistency (6 or below). These are the key areas that need attention, and it may be helpful to begin with one of these to explore your values further.
Dive Into Your Values: On a new sheet of paper, choose one of the life areas from above, and spend 10 minutes writing about your deepest values related to this area. This may seem brief, but trust the process! Ask yourself the following questions to guide your reflection:
- What do you care about most in this area?
- What actions do you want to take that truly reflect your values in this area?
- When has this value been important in your life?
- Who in your life embodies this value, and what does that mean to you?
- What have you observed in others when they honor or disregard this value?
- Have you ever violated this value, and if so, what were the consequences?
- What specific actions can you take to better align with this value?
As you write, focus on describing the qualities you wish to manifest in your life—qualities that hold intrinsic importance to you. Keep the focus on the actions you want to embody, rather than what you expect from others.
If you get stuck during the writing, keep going. Even if you repeat yourself, continue until something new emerges. Avoid reading your writing until the full 10 minutes are up—this is important for letting your thoughts flow freely.
Once the 10 minutes have passed, review what you wrote and identify examples of what you truly want in that area of life. These should be behaviors or actions that align with your values. From there, come up with three practical actions you can take to align more closely with your values. For instance, if you chose “Intimate Relationships” and recognized the importance of spending time together, think of three easy ways to achieve this, such as scheduling regular date nights, working on a project together, or finding an exercise routine you can both enjoy and encourage each other in.
Next, look for any qualities you mentioned and write down those that stand out most. These might be single qualities or multiple ones that you can refine into three or four key words. These words will act as signposts to guide your future value-based choices.
If you’re unsure what qualities you might be describing, here are some examples: lovingly, creatively, thoughtfully, adventurously, compassionately, honestly, peacefully, humorously, dependably, and so on.
Ultimately, values only have meaning when you live them and allow them to guide your actions. And they become the backbone courage can be built on, especially in living an authentic life. When we allow ourselves to be vulnerable about what is important to us, we can summon the courage for push through our fears to claim them. Think about how you want to show up at a family event, during a work presentation, at your children’s school play, or when walking your dog. By letting your values guide you, even in small moments, you can live with more fulfillment, meaning, and a deep sense that you’re living a life that matters.
Want more on courage?
As you continue in your journal, think about how you can bring more courage into your daily life. What small steps can you take to confront your fears? How can you align your actions with your values, even when it’s challenging? Remember that every act of courage, no matter how small, strengthens your inner resolve and empowers you to face future challenges with greater confidence.